3.24.2011

thoughts

This is an excerpt from my Journal, i think it was worth sharing.

So the other day i was brushing my teeth or some random task and a thought came to me. You know when you have a thought just come to you and it makes you want to change your life right then and there, and then you spit out your toothpaste and go on with life and nothing changes? Well this time i really wanted to change.

My thought was about Halle, and how that little girl loves me so much, oh so much. She almost started crying when i told her i was going to dinner with friends and wouldn't be able to put her to bed. I thought about how soon she won't be the one vying for attention, I will. I will want her to play with me, talk to me, sing, dance with me and oh how sad it will make me that she will want nothing to do with me. What have i been thinking or doing? Just today she wanted me to come outside and play with her and what did i do? i told her no, i need to fold the laundry . . . oh my goodness Lacey, really??? the laundry, that was more important then seizing the opportunity to go play with my 3 year old daughter? And that was just one incident. There have been so many more and it is breaking my heart just thinking about it. I basically told my baby that i would rather do laundry than play go play with her, how heartbreaking. Yet, she still loves me more than anything. Oh how ashamed i am. I needs a serious adjustment in my priorities, laundry . . . honsetly.

I love my kiddies more that anything and will try to make our time together more fun, enchanting, magical, happy, lovely, imaginative and joyful. Tomorrow is a new day.

8 comments:

heidikins said...

This is so beautiful, down with laundry!!

xox

pinksuedeshoe said...

This post gave me goosebumps. The kind that you get when you know someone is telling the truth, and that you should be very carefully listening. Thank you for this. Really. And amen to heidi- Down with Laundry!

Lindsey said...

Oh cute Lace, you are an amazing mom though!

The Speres said...

I've had the same thoughts about my time with Bryce lately...our days of being childless are very limited now and yet I feel that we are already so focused on baby stuff and work, etc, that I let other things get in the way of just spending time with him. Anyway, your post totally resonated with me. There are way more important things than laundry and vacuuming and registering for baby stuff. Thanks, Lacey!

Laura said...

It's so hard to find the balance between getting things done and doing the things you want to do. I'm so glad you posted this, because you've really got me thinking about how I spend my time with Charlotte. She won't be little forever and I need to do a much better job treasuring these moments with her.

lauren ann said...

You are good mama..

Lacey said...

I can totally relate to this. Thanks for posting. It gave me much to think about.

Lani said...

Oh wow I had the same thought because I am really finding it hard to balance spending time playing with Connor and holding and talking to Crew and then my selfish trying to do what I want to do. Thanks for posting this and I am also going to try to be a better Mom!